I'm still crouching in the shadowed corner of my plans.
D's back surgery has been a total success. But what a lot a work for a nurse who doesn't nurse anymore. How much do I give up to be available? Apparently early bed time. He wants to watch Six Feet Under with me. We can't let the kids watch. I'm so tired and I miss reading. Usually he's busy or out in the evening. So this is a good thing.
At least I'm sleeping again after at least 2 weeks of misery.
But my daughter is home, unable to heal from a nasty virus. That's work too. She's 13 and knows how to drink water and sleep. But it's been going on for over a week. It's everywhere. She misses skating and she was only able to go to school for a half day this week.
I hear myself saying "when things get back to normal". That'll never happen. Things will change. But nothing is normal.
Don't let external controls and others' expectations keep you from living a real life. The kids are grown now. I'm still here if I'm at school or the gym or even work.
D will heal and go back to spending all his time at work or with the pipe band. I can't give up opportunities now that will lead to greater fulfillment.
So...
Working hard on this dreadfully poorly prepared course for library tech. New!! Job application in to the School Board to work as a Teacher's Assistant. I could use my pediatric knowledge and the experience I have from volunteering (countless) hours in the school.
And of course my lovely knitting.
I sat with my daughter on Sunday afternoon to watch a video and appease my guilt for being out in the evenings. I knit so much on my Socks that Rock that I got a cut on my finger. Serious knitting.
She knit a scarf and I was sent to the wool shop to get her more materials. Yay! I sereptiously picked up some more Kureyon. This is better than collecting salt and pepper shakers.
Sweet dreams are made of these.
